Star Citizen | Talkin’ Shop IAE 2955 - Greycat Industrial & Everything In-Between

Transcript — every row opens the video at that moment

1. 00:00:00

   [laughter] >> Lexi! Come on, Gale. >> [laughter] >> This is Talking Shop. The People's Alliance welcomes you to join us in expression. Join us in respect. Join us in Levski. Here, we believe in equality. Not just in words, but in how we live. We stand for the fundamental rights of all sentient beings. We want to build together and thrive together. Step away from greed and the chains of those who would control you. Stand with us. Be part of something greater. And welcome back. Finally. Yeah. We've been off air for a minute. >> Too long. So, do you want to tell them? Tell them?

2. 00:00:48

   Why we've been off the air for so long, Lexi? Geez, where to start? So, I thought I was just taking a normal job from Interstellar. >> Uh you of all people should know there's no such thing, but sure. I pick up the contract. Everything seems on the up and up. Mhm. I'm heading to some derelict station in Croiseum. Mhm. Go on. So, I get to the station that's supposed to be abandoned. >> Uh of course. It wasn't abandoned, obviously. >> Stop stalling. Tell them what you did. There's some real jerks flying around. >> Lexi. And I ended up under attack by the Vanduul. Finally. I was personally waiting for the merchant man to come out. Almost painful. Speaking of painful, let's try to bring it back to the show.

3. 00:01:36

   Tell me about the ships. Look at you, Gale. Learning to host so well. But yeah, they were in Scythes and Glaives. So, not one of the bigger clans with the newer stuff then. Newer Blades and Stingers though. Uh that's odd. I wonder what that means. It doesn't matter in the moment. Trick is to keep your eyes open and try not to piss your pants. >> Sage advice. Ah, Lexi. He'd have been so proud of you. 18 kills and counting. And without even scuffing my wolf. >> I still can't believe you fly 22. Uh [clears throat] these latest Vanduul raids >> [snorts] >> are the result of everything I've been banging on about for years. Here we go. >> What did folks expect was going to happen? The day government chooses corporate greed and the likes of ASD,

4. 00:02:24

   we're all in trouble. If this was on Stanton's doorstep, sure, it'd be funny. But it's not. It's here. With us. And now kids like you are risking your lives trying to clean up someone else's mess. It's just not right. Don't pull this crap again, kid. I won't. Till I will. Hey. Nice piloting. And I mean, if I die, who else is going to buy your Star Kitten Crunchies? This isn't some bit for a broadcast. If you weren't such a good pilot, I would have been worried to death. Yeah, yeah. I get it. Uh didn't make the news though. Mhm. Want to hear my five minutes of fame? Nah. This is James Herriman with an SSN news

5. 00:03:13

   flash. Another Vanduul raid has been reported in the Nix system. Many denizens of Levski continue to join in the efforts to repel the attacks in the Croiseum belt while investigating ties to illicit trade between systems. [music] A representative from the People's Alliance have issued the following statement. We are a free people. Independent from any military agenda. But make no mistake, we will vigorously defend what we have from all aggressors. Be they Vanduul, the UEE, or anyone coming to this system looking for trouble. Levski will remain a safe haven for anyone who values liberty and freedom from tyranny. And trade remains open to all citizens of the UEE. Strong words from the proud people of Levski. Meanwhile, the Empire reminds all of its citizens that containing the

6. 00:04:00

   Vanduul threat is the responsibility of all capable pilots. And encourages us all to stop these incursions in Nix before they endanger more civilized and aligned systems. This has been SSN news flash. Until next time. That was me. I'm the denizens of Levski. And that was you, the representative of the people. >> Well, that was the official voice, but yeah, I I I guess I would call myself a repres- I mean Your five minutes are up. Let's get on with it. Oh, [gasps] the rundown. Run, run, run, run. Did you make that? What do you think? I kind of loved it. >> Yes, I did it. >> Oh, that's the stuff. Happy Gale is the best. So, what's up first?

7. 00:04:50

   >> It's topical. Let's talk about the Stinger from fake ship manufacturer Esperia. Molly said it was drawing audible gasps of horror in the exotics hall. >> From other people or just her? I can't help but think it's all a little ridiculous. What? Molly? Everybody just a star system over falling over this Esperia made fetish object. >> Mhm. [clears throat] Whilst we sweat it out on the wrong side of the jump point, actually going toe to toe with the real thing. >> Huh. Another face-off with a Vanduul and you suddenly have a political perspective. >> What? Makes me so proud. You joining me in the Vanduul replicas are in poor taste camp then? >> All I'm saying is you didn't see any Empire ship makers cranking out a Vanduul ship during either of those conflicts. >> Ah, well, they just hadn't realized they could capitalize on it yet. Just so much death and destruction.

8. 00:05:37

   Anyway, did you hear about the Gatak reveal? The reveal is coming up next year and its cargo has been jacked up to 640 SCU. Ah, I still remember when we used to use freight units. Every ship had an appropriate FU number. What was yours? >> Immeasurable. >> Of course. Let's [clears throat] get to Kruger Day. My new favorite ship and Vanduul slayer. I want to talk about the M22 Alpha Wolf. Well, for a trumped-up parts manufacturer, I'd say they really carved out a nice little niche. Always knew I was an alpha. >> Yeah, well, it's pretty popular. And those new weapon kits letting you customize both is it's pretty okay. Strong words, Gale. Are they giving us too much of a good

9. 00:06:25

   thing at this point though? I heard a rumor they were losing the fin. >> I don't know. They they didn't get rid of it. And they added a tail. I'm glad I'm proven. They just made it smaller. And on the 21, you can now tuck it in. I'm uh uncomfortable with this conversation. Infinitesimal. Uh Well, I like it. It's character. And the lasers on this thing are pretty cool, too. >> seen such a thing as an uncool laser? They're clearly an obvious marketing trick, but hey, they work. I mean, you're still here. An uncool laser depends on who's firing. Poetic. So, now that we're all caught up on the stuff we mostly love was out saving the universe. >> Nice. Today, would you believe, we're looking at the Greycat MDC. Oh, yes, my favorite. The murder death car. Oh,

10. 00:07:13

    perfect. [laughter] >> Basically a box of wheels with an automated turret. When it works. >> Hey, I like it. Give me this one. I've been waiting for years for Greycat to flex their muscles on Tumbril. Is that what they're doing? Yeah. There's a reason Greycat is a household name galaxy-wide. It is a terrific back catalog. All right, Gale. This should be good. >> PTV. Only vehicle I can be in a fair race. The STV. >> The adorable Steve. >> The MTC. Honestly, the cutest war double weapon I've ever seen. >> The ROC. >> Almost there. And that's it. Absolutely no other vehicle worth mentioning. Nil. Nada. Come on, Gale. What about the ROC DS? Ah, the ROC has a solid chassis. So, what if the DS is a little challenging? Yeah. [laughter]

11. 00:08:01

    Twice the operational complications with the same underwhelming results. The ROC double shy. >> That's quite good. What the hell is that? The I'm actually getting a comms through. That was bound to happen sooner or later. Oh, like an angel of Levski fan, I'm sure. >> Well, seeing as I'm living life on the wild side these days, I'm going to patch it in. Oh, yeah. Hello. >> Uh hi. You're on the air. This is Talking Shop. Oh, wow. I got through. Uh yeah. You want to tell us how the hell you did that? No [laughter] worries. No one has actually called this channel before. >> I didn't even know they could. Oh. This is the Don Pew. Long time, first time. >> Hi, Don. I couldn't sit idly by watching

12. 00:08:49

    you disrespect the ROC like that. Look. [laughter] Oh my god, Gale. It's happening. All right. Go on then. In 2951, I was hired by Greycat Industrial to improve upon perfection. Oh. I did. I designed a vehicle that does everything the original can do, but now required two people to do it. Right. And this was an improvement? >> Mhm. It was. Oh. Cuz everyone knows throwing more people at a task makes things better and faster and less lonely. That's called teamwork. >> Oh. >> Gale. I don't know about it. You know what's better than four wheels? Six wheels. This [laughter] is brilliant, right? What? Neil's put you up to this, didn't he? Not a prank, guys. You've all just witnessed two historical moments in one. The first time we accept comms and the first time someone defends

13. 00:09:39

    the ROC dual strength. >> Oh my Pah [music] cares. Pah fights. Pah protects. And so can you. Sponsor a Yurman D today and help safeguard this [music] beautiful species from extinction. Today, you can make a difference. Today, you can save a life. PAW Preserve all wildlife. You aren't going to believe this, Gail. Oh, no. What? >> The light's flashing. Uh And another call comes. >> You're joking, right? The light's flashing. I'm pretty sure. >> Don't answer it. Then we just learned a lesson about >> Gail, you won't believe who it is. Is it Bats? No, but good guess. >> Then I don't care. Well, unless the

14. 00:10:28

    screen is off, it appears the caller is your new best friend, Jax McCleary. What? Actually? Yeah. No way. Then answer it. >> You just said That was before. This is now. Answer the damn call. Okay, okay. Geez. Uh hello, Jax McCleary. You're on the air and uh we're talking shop. Oh, that's pretty good. [laughter] Right? Just kind of came out. Yeah, if ever take calls in the future, we'll use that. >> We won't. So, uh Jax? Are you there? Uh uh yeah, I'm here. Jax, it's Gail. Quark! Oh, thank god. Is this a clear channel? Uh What? Is this channel clean or not? We told you a bunch of times, Mr. McCleary, this is not a family show. The show I just did in Delamar, right? It's Levsky. Yeah, that's us. Okay, good. Well, I'm

15. 00:11:17

    here in Orison. I've lost Jimmy, probably kidnapped again, and I feel like I'm losing my mind. >> Oh, oh. Sorry. Jimmy's been what? I mean, have you seen this MDC thing Greycat is pushing? >> What? >> My goodness, that turret should not be on this type of vehicle. >> Yeah, yeah, I'm inclined to agree, but Jax, listen, man. >> I mean, what is Greycat trying to do here? Next thing you know, we'll have fully militarized Saturn moms and dads dialing in ballistic strikes on their kids' rival team's zero-G pizza parties. Jakes! Does everything have to have a damn gun on it? I mean, where does it end, Laszlo? >> Laszlo? I know what Jimmy would say. A what? Exactly. Gosh, I miss his little voice. You know, it's funny you called in, Jax. We were literally just talking about this

16. 00:12:04

    earlier. I was saying that >> I was at ArcCorp the other day, and I kid you not, I saw some slick-looking business type slide into a vending machine. A vending machine? Is this guy okay? >> Who knows? But I know nefarious antics when I see them, I'll tell you that much. Probably some sort of hidden listening station. It's the secret portal to Benny Henge. >> Or that. Uh maybe don't egg him on. That's funny. I know I must sound doolally, but it isn't that far-fetched. When you've worked in the entertainment industry as long as I have, you see some I can only imagine. Anyway, I should probably get back. A bunch of Greycat executives just bought a round and I left them hanging. Just need to offload, and Jimmy's still MIA. Actually, how did you get this number?

17. 00:12:51

    Uh no, no, no, no, no, no. You're good, Jax. You aren't crazy. That that turret is excessive, and the IAE is decadent and depraved. >> It sure is, Gabe. Fueled by a commercial megacorp. Gail, you sound like a Let's call it a day, shall we? Uh okay. Well, to all my listeners, you're welcome. This is Jax McCleary signing off. >> Call anytime, Jax. Oh, [sighs and gasps] Gail. Wow. That was unhinged. >> To put it lightly. So, Jimmy was the normal one all along, huh? Yeah, could this episode get any w- Worse? Don't think so. I was going to say weirder. I hope he finds Jimmy. I'm lost for words. Really? Uh yeah. Why?

18. 00:13:38

    Then I guess I'd better do this ad read. Finally, some good news. Steak or meaty claim with lard bacon. >> Uh we're absolutely circling the drain here. No, at every warmer's location, our thick or meaty or bacon will build a Ham Hawk Homestead of savory goodness on your tongue. >> I feel like I need a shower just hearing you saying this. Tame the flavor frontier with every bite. Lard bacon, steak your claim. Steak is spelled s t e a k, isn't it? >> You know it is. Uh I don't know what's worse, the saturated fat or the corporate soul rot. I don't know. I thought this one was actually pretty well done. >> Har, har, har. No, for real. They hit it out of the pork. Moving on. >> Moving. Please stop. >> Okay, sorry. Uh Well, Gail, I've been meaning we wrap this up before we do any more serious

19. 00:14:27

    damage. It might be too late for that. All the more reason to pull the rip cord. Well, what did we learn today, Lexi? Other than never ever take unscheduled calls on air, no matter who they're from. We learned not every ship or vehicle needs to be a war machine, but that I [clears throat] am a war machine. Too right. We also learned that steak can mean two things at once. It's not been the worst episode ever. It could be the weirdest episode we've done. Well, that was our E, everyone. Sure, we missed half of it cuz I was out saving our behinds. You're welcome. I said thanks, didn't I? Sure, Gail still hates most people, but we discovered his guilty pleasure, Jax. And what? But had fun, though. You know, I actually did. Doesn't get any sweeter than that, listeners.

20. 00:15:14

    What a way to end a crazy week. From me, Lex, and me, Gail. Thanks for pa- Thanks for passing on. Oh, it's the last bit, Gail. You've been listening to Talking Shop, brought to you from Levsky in the Nick System with hosts Lexi Marlowe and Gail Kastner. This is an independent show and doesn't not reflect the views of Teacher's Ship Shop.